Saturday, 13 March 2010

Least Haunted

Every now and again I'm lucky enough to be treated to the televisual phenomonon that is 'Most Haunted'. This TV show, which is tucked away on one of the dust-bunny channels round the back of the TV set, is actually phenomenally successful with a great many ardent fans.
Unfortunately I am not one of them.
The show is hosted by Yvette Fielding (once of Blue Peter) who spends her time 'communicating' with spirits by asking them to tap a number of times (like a counting horse) when she is not screaming and flapping like a ten year old. The programme is filmed in night vision for extra spookiness (so everyone's eyeballs take on a rabid dog look) as they fumble their way around various old houses and castles up and down the country.

Yvette is accompanied by a team on her 'investigation' including a medium, a parapsychologist (ooooh), a fat make-up artist, a cameraman and a sound engineer and after an interesting historical summary at the outset they proceed to spend their time looking shocked and saying 'did you hear/ see that' to camera for hours on end. Usually there will be a rock or a spoon (??) thrown in their general direction by persons unknown (apparently). Sometimes the medium will be aware of a spirit (usually a man in a hat who is a bit unhappy) and they will attempt to communicate. What is always interesting is that the mediums (media?) always look the most spooked by a sudden sound.
They are brilliant at what they do and Yvette Fielding and her husband Karl have made a tidy sum from the programme format.
However after 9 years or so, for all their technology and hours of footage they don't seem to have spotted anything more compelling than a possible 'orb' (ie a moth) on film.

Every show is the same! It is like Groundhog Day and it drives me insane.

The only saving grace is that if I endure this - then I can earn credits to watch the football. Mind you, sometimes watching my team is like a horror show. Boo


  1. You love it really. Shall I get us tickets for Derek Ackorah?

  2. My brother mentioned the level of scam that is involved here. Nameley that you can't commission a TV series where nothing is going to happen can you? A lot of the stuff is either total planned fix, excitement or a quick nudge by the camera man to make things seem worth the programme fees.
    I predict that when you hold your fork up to your mouth today....your mouth will magically open! Spooky!

  3. It's just fun....isn't it?....Please say it is

  4. It is just like Sardines with a video camera.
    Actually I have an idea for a new show. It's called 'Sardines with a video camera' and it features some sardines who visit wrecks and scare each other. Like it?
    Me neither. It will be great.

  5. Well I like it and you don't because you're scared!